March 2012 - Mark Kaplowitz

29 March 2012

Remember When There Weren’t All These Mediums?

The other night I caught a show on TLC called “Long Island Medium.” Being from Long Island myself, I thought that this might be a show about the first Long Islander to pass on the largest size of food or drink offered at a restaurant. But no, it was about the life and work of a woman named Theresa Caputo,...

Television and Movies Comments: 7

26 March 2012

Remember the Etch A Sketch?

I’ve been hearing a lot of people talk about the Etch A Sketch lately. What a fantastic toy. A plastic rectangle and knobs for kids who couldn’t deal with crayons and paint. I loved how the advertisements for the Etch A Sketch always showed works of art that could hang in the Louvre next to the Caravaggios. All I ever...

Toys Comments: 8

22 March 2012

Remember When You Didn’t Hunger For The Hunger Games?

Yesterday’s “Today” show featured Jennifer Lawrence, the star of “The Hunger Games,” the movie version of the latest series of books for adults who like to read kids’ books. I was all set to scoff until they started showing clips of the film, where kids have to do battle on television in a dystopian future. The story seemed so compelling...

Television and Movies Comments: 12

19 March 2012

Remember When You Didn’t See Those “26.2” Stickers On Cars?

I was on my way to Lowe’s to complain that I couldn’t push the walls of my house like the people in that “Never Stop Improving” commercial, when I saw a sticker on the back of a car that read “26.2” in bold black print against a white background. I’ve nearly gotten into accidents trying to decipher these cryptic stickers....

Cars Comments: 20

15 March 2012

Remember Julius Caesar?

What can be said about Julius Caesar that has not already been said? He was a very good tipper, routinely going over 20% and making everyone else at the table feel cheap. One time, when we were in Gaul fighting the Celts over whether their name was pronounced with a hard or a soft “C,” Caesar parked his chariot in...

Sappy Reflection Comments: 10

12 March 2012

Remember Renting Movies At the Video Store?

The video rental store near my home had a room in the back that you entered through a pair of saloon-style swinging half-doors. The room was low-lit with a reddish tint and greeted customers with a sign, set at eye-level for the average 11-year-old boy, that read, “Must Be 18 or Older to Enter This Room.” My under-18 friends and...

Television and Movies Comments: 17

8 March 2012

Remember the President’s Fitness Test?

When I was in elementary school and completing my gym fellowship, after the square dancing seminar but before I had to defend my thesis on crab soccer, we were advised that we would all be participating in something called the President’s Test on Fitness. The President’s Test, as we called it, was a series of five events by which we’d...

School Comments: 16

5 March 2012

Remember When Television Programs Didn’t Have Animated Promos For Other Programs?

When I was a young whippersnapper and could eat at McDonald’s three times a week without a health care proxy, there was a separation between television programs, the commercials that funded the television programs, and the advertisements for upcoming television programs that would attract more sponsors, who would fund more televisions etc. I could watch an entire episode of Growing...

Television and Movies Comments: 14

1 March 2012

Remember When There Weren’t All These Fitness Devices?

It seems like every time I have to move my belt out another notch there is another fitness device being marketed. My first introduction to exercise devices was watching my grandfather use the stairs. He was the original stairmaster. Whenever he and my grandmother came to visit us for Mother’s Day or Rosh Hashanah, my grandfather would spend time each...

Health and Fitness Comments: 8

Monthly Archive: March, 2012